The importance of living, relating, and working with authenticity would seem obvious. Finding our truest self and living that would seem obvious. Being who we are no matter what others may think or say would seem obvious.

This past weekend, I had a chance to visit with Stephen Whiteley, author of the 2012 Inspirational Book of the Year Happiness Works! Get Yours Here! (http://happinessworks.ca/) Steve and I spoke for about an hour about his experiences and thoughts and how he came up with his program for discovering the joy within.

What I found most interesting during our talk was that we seemed to keep coming back to the idea that it all begins with authenticity, being our real self whoever that person is, and learning to be happy with who we are. After Steve and I finished our discussion, I went back to the project I was working on and later that day was thinking about how authenticity also leads to integrity which leads to success.

I believe success is, as Earl Nightingale defined it in The Strangest Secret, “the progressive realization of a worthy ideal or goal.” It may involve financial wealth, a joy filled relationship, many things. To be “worthy,” the goal or ideal must be our own and we’re right back to authenticity.

So how does “integrity” tie into this. When we are living a life that is not truly our own, not only do we lack authenticity; we lack integrity as well. When we are putting the real us out there, integrity goes along with that. This is who I am. Take me or leave me as I am. Or as Steve put it, “What you think of me is none of my business.”

The authentic life is the real life. The real life is the integrous life. The integrous life is the successful life, the happy life. How do we learn to live and experience authenticity? We journey.

All of us have the ability to discover our best selves, our real selves, our highest selves. We have to look for it. It has to be something we REALLY want. We have to want to be who we are at our core. We have to be willing to search for the person we were born to be. She or he is there. She or he has been there all along. Once we make the commitment, then we decide what tools will help us get there. One tool that helped me was from Life Potential Developments (www.lifepotentialdevelopments.com) called The Time-Based Technique. Since I earned a certification with LPD, I have shared this with many of my business coaching clients. The entire program has value but this is the one thing that helped me most and in many ways.

Steve’s book would be a good tool for the journey. And I’m sure there are many other books, audio programs, and other things that can help someone discover and live their most authentic life. To my thinking, this is the key to success and the key to happiness - authenticity. Or, putting it another way, being happy with who we are - the real us - and living that.

Not too long ago, I had a client who was completely (and I mean completely) wrapped up in his own prestige and image - living for others, living for position, living for everyone other than himself. Of course, to say that he lacked a sense of authenticity would be a gross understatement. He also lacked any sense of happiness. Integrity was not important to him. Success was not within his grasp. Life coaching is not something that I offer. With this client, however, I made an exception. I found myself emphasizing the importance of authenticity. I found myself asking the question I ask of every client, “What do YOU want?” Not what do others in your life want. What do YOU want? After all, the answer to that should be pretty authentic. In time, we made headway and progress. This client is doing better than he ever has.

So, sometimes that one question, “What do I want?” can be a key to discovering who we are, our authentic self, and all the rest.